Monday, October 29

day 11823: too cool for school

Over the past months, people from my past have been popping up in my inbox unexpectedly. "Reunion this, get together that, network now... haven't seen you 5, 10, 15 years, wouldn't it be great to get together and catch up?"

Um, no.

I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but there's a reason you don't know anything about me anymore. And quite frankly, just because you found someone from Junior Kindergarten on Facebook does not mean that the rest of the Kindergarten graduating class is interested in knowing what you've been up to... even if you do have six kids from seven different dads cuz you can't figure out who fathered #4..

No offense, but if I was really interested in keeping in touch, I would have texted, called or emailed sometime in the past year or two. And if you haven't heard from me, well, I have a wierd thing where I'm emotionally distant and completely uninterested in people from my past (no matter how much you meant to me at that brief moment in time).

Blame pms, blame age, blame my new-found sobriety and hence bitterness (just joking, duh), but what's done is done. I've moved on and so should you. So please, while I think it's great that you're trying to keep a grasp onto our quickly fading youth, know this... I'M TOO COOL FOR YOU.

Just joking. Truth is, I don't really care.

ps. Facebook stalking and trying to find me through friends of friends of friends and then getting "common" friends to email me for my contact info... yo, that just ain't cool.


jay said...

LOL... I take it you aren't going to the U reunion!

schmassion said...

Lucky me, I actually do have other plans... :)

Akapoor said...

Is that why you have been ignoring my calls? Was I just a phase in your now too cool life?

schmassion said...

nice try... you don't call, you don't write... i'm the one with the breaking heart here...