passion...schmassion

Day 9930: Illogical arguments

Conclusion: there is no pleasing the parental units.

Every parent wants what is best for their child. Agreed. Every parent knows what's best for their child. Disagree. In many ways, yes, parents do give a wider perspective, a broader outlook, and years of experience to what they think is best for their child. On the other hand, occassionally their beliefs are blatantly one-sided and narrow minded and refuse to consider that there might be an alternative view point to the issue. It is times like these that one must realize that parents don't know everything, and it's better not to listen to them.

I grew up in a sheltered environment. A very loving one, a very priviledged one, but still very, very sheltered. We were not encouraged to have our own points of view. We were not encouraged to debate and formulate our own opinions on things. It was more of a you're-doing-this-because-we-said-so kind of upbringing. Not unlike many of the parent-child relationships of yore. No waves were made. No one pushed the envelope. Not really. There was no major rebelling or anything. Just existence. We were dummies that follow along because life's mapped out for them to the tiniest degree. And to some sense, we're still dummies. I'm still a dummy.

We go with the flow. We still don't make waves. We'd rather live "secret" lives and not share certain aspects of our lives with our parents because we don't want the hassle of the parent-child lecture - the nagging, the sense that we're disappointing the people that we respect the most and actually think very highly of. Regardless of how the relationship evolves and changes they will always be the parents, and as a child, we will always be searching for their approval. My mom and I became friends a few years back. It was not uncommon for me to take my problems to her and through some discussion, come to a conclusion that I was comfortable with. But recently, it changed. Since the sista departed for the Texan south, it's once again reverted back to the old parent-child relationship, where she feels that as a parent, I must automatically do whatever she wants me to do. She still thinks of me as her baby. She feels that she still needs to control every aspect of my life and has ordered me, in not so many words, to see her once a week. A point that I sorely disagree upon. I call her every day. I don't need to see her every day. I don't need to hear how she disapproves with my lifestyle...everyday.

I've come to realize though, that the "logical" arguments that they make are not very logical at all. A few minor examples...

Toot-toot: don't get a dog because then you'll stay home all the time to keep the dog company. And now that I actually have a life and go out more (instead of studying all the time, and watching television)... don't go out so much - stay home and keep the dog company.

Exercising: go out and exercise so that you can lose weight. And now that I'm climbing twice a week, playing hockey on occasion and snowboarding every week... stop going out to exercise so much... it's not good for you.

Meeting guys: go out and meet more guys... and now that I have a life... stop going out so to the gym so much...there's no guys there... and what... guys are supposed to magically appear before me as I sit at home and watch television and keep the dog company???

Parents don't make sense. It's time to stop listening to them and living my own life. I'm a big girl... I can take care of myself. I'm a smart cookie no matter who calls me an airhead.